Coffee Log, Year 2, Day 185


Coffee:  Maxwell House Master Blend, Office Coffee

I was at a kitchen table playing Dungeons and Dragons at twelve years old. It was Z’s birthday. His older brother was DM’ing. We were playing 2nd edition.

I’d rolled an Elven wizard who had 2 hit points. First level spells, hardly devastating. I spent most of the game waiting behind the party line as they fought monsters, scouted traps, preciously keeping my few spells for when they were most important. We went through a dark dungeon and came out of it. Then we met some merchants. Our warrior decided to rob them. I couldn’t handle that so I cast my first spell. I got him with a magic missile and it killed him (he’d been hurt in the dungeons). Promptly after that, our ranger got me back with an arrow to my 2HP skull. Two party members down and no high-level priests around to revive them, we all called it quits on the game. Some of the other kids were pissed. I’d put a stop to the night.

Every year I get older seems to muddy my convictions. I talk to Trump supporters and try to find the places they tuck away the good. Maybe its that I’ve had a longer life to live out my own imperfections – mistakes and missteps, tumbling off of high highways with no way of getting back.

Currently Reading: Queen, Suzanne Crain Miller

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It is not always the same thing to be a good man and a good citizen.

Aristotle, Politics

Coffee Log, Day 49


Coffee: Cafe Pajaro, Extra Dark, Trader Joe’s Brand

I looked at my philosophy textbooks today. I remember being excited when I bought Plato’s Complete Works. It’s a big red book with bible-thin pages. Cost as much as a month of groceries. I haven’t opened it since 2012.

School gasses us up on impotent ideas. I’m sure there’s someone out there with a philosophy degree who took her studied ideas and built an action out of them, but I bet she’s rare. There are two cultures: working-class necessity or privileged idleness. The first is desperate enough to teach kids to kick and claw any way they can and the other is comfortable enough to teach kids how to ‘seem’ but not how to ‘be.’ Education fails them both. It doesn’t give a way out and it doesn’t guide privilege into useful action.

I was a teacher for awhile, but I wasn’t very good at it.

Currently Reading:
Tar Baby, Toni Morrison

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“Educating the mind without educating the heart is no education at all.” – Aristotle