Coffee Log, Year 2, Day 59


Coffee: Maxwell House Drip, Office Coffee; I walked into the bank and went straight back to the brewer in the break room; I made coffee; I was so tired this morning that even the steam from the coffee machine felt like it might knock me over; when I tasted the first cup, it was stiff as a cockroach’s ankles; good, welcome, as low-down as me.

I don’t know what to say today. Yet somehow there’s always something to say.

I talked to a woman today who’s going through a divorce. Her husband wrested control of her house, her job, her finances, but gave up all custody of the kids. It’s a typical story, at least the way she tells it. She said they’d been together for twenty-three years. It made me think about what you owe someone.

My blinds broke a couple days ago. This is the third time they’ve broken, the cross-beam snapping in the same place each time. I don’t know if it’s poor construction or that I’m using too much force. This time, though, I didn’t bother putting in a maintenance request. I’ve got my two mismatched blue curtains (a gift from an old friend) and they’re doing a good enough job keeping the light out, only I’ve noticed that the sun has a way of shining on them in the mornings that makes them glow, nuclear fallout, or a lost jellyfish. It’s not a bad color, not impressive either. Every time I see it, I think about that friend and how she gave me these curtains for free. She was moving. Needed to free the space. But I’ve gotten so much use out of them that I sometimes wonder if I owe her?

Currently Reading: Kitchen Confidential, Anthony Bourdain

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We like to admit to only that which already glows, although it is nobler to support brightness before it glows, not afterwards.

Dejan Stojanovic, The Sun Watches the Sun