Coffee Log, Day 317


Coffee Tea: Earl Grey, Bigelow Brand; I woke up feeling somewhat energetic; ‘somewhat’ is a lot more energy than I typically have; I didn’t want to dilute that with too much caffeine, so I stuck with tea; it tastes like an idle afternoon.

Modern media is a weird thing. It’s produced in such great quantities that you could spend all day, every day consuming it. And to be a part of any kind of zeitgeist, you pretty much have to do just that. Water cooler conversations are less about sports and more about your latest Netflix binge.

For about six years I’ve subscribed to the website ‘’ It’s nominally a video-gaming site, but the best way to think of it would be a games-related Mystery Science Theater 3000. There’s a team of about ten editor/producers who record and appear in the videos to talk over and joke about this or that game. There’s podcasts, series, and something new everyday.

As someone who has trouble sleeping, one thing I’ve found marginally helpful is to listen to podcasts as I’m going to bed. Half-focusing on a conversation tricks my brain into shutting off. I’m not too picky about the podcast, but most nights it ends up being something off of GiantBomb – I subscribe to them anyway, it’s easy, thoughtless to press play.

Because of this, I recognize those same 10 editor/producer’s voices as well as I recognize my best friends’. They’re with me most days. They follow me to sleep. I think that’s incredibly bizarre. I’ve never met these people – I never will meet them – and yet they’re a daily part of my life.

There almost seems to be a cultural aversion to in-person interaction in 2019. We seem to understand each other best with a computer screen between us. And in a small way I’m a part of that, and so are you – you probably only know me through this blog, and if you wanted to, you could connect with me here every day.

I can’t decide how I feel about all this. In some ways it’s comforting – a quilt blanket to drape over yourself when you need it, all the comfort of a person without their complications. In others, though, I worry that I’m losing something fundamental and replacing it – however unintentionally – with air. You stop drinking water when the soda fountain’s installed.

Novel Count: 10,989

Currently Reading: Killing Commendatore, Haruki Murakami

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Just move to the Internet, its great here. We get to live inside where the weather is always awesome.

John Green

Coffee Log, Day 161


Coffee: Fair Trade Five County Espresso Blend, Trader Joe’s Brand

I can hardly keep up anymore. Each day is a different story, different spin. Last week’s crises are Alexander crossing the Euphrates; this morning was the Civil War. Part of it’s attention, part of it’s the internet – things go a lot quicker when it takes two seconds to send a message around the world.

The powers that be are clued in: Giuliani tells Mueller to ‘hurry up.’ Obama won’t mention Ocasio-Cortez in his endorsements. Old men of power want you to forget that change can happen, that real change takes time; instead, they want popcorn press conferences and Chinese-made American flags.

Language is power, but language is also dangerous. In Rome, they’d nail your hands to a cross and cut you open for preaching a single book; that went on for hundreds of years. Now, it’s tweet tweet post post caption this that picture, narrate the video where your black lover’s murdered by a white cop, hashtag twenty-seven years of men’s hands on your ass. It’s vital, succulent, burst open like ripe tomatoes, easily washed down the drain like so much juice.

It’s hard to pay attention when everyone’s got an important story. It’s easy for power to change a word, a phrase, delete this and that and make us miss the important parts. We need our holy book. We need a thick bound compendium worth being crucified for. Each page a sex, creed, color, representation. All our spit-blood memoirs wave-wave on the internet and pass us by. We need something stable and shared.

But what’s permanent look like in 2018?

Currently Reading: LaRose, Louise Erdrich

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“Hold down through these troubled times, be another victim to my stubborn pride

Stuck in the grind, Stuck in the grind, I’m stuck in the grind” – Nipsey Hussle, Stucc in the Grind