Coffee Log, Year 2, Day 247


Coffee: Cafe Pajaro Extra Dark, Trader Joe’s; coffee dark as squid ink; did you know that when a squid sprays it’s got to keep moving or it’ll suffocate? the most dangerous things were inside us all along; the coffee was good, burnt bread

I walked to a smoothie shop. E came with me. I wore my favorite sweater, it was only just cold enough. At the strip-mall, everyone was out and about. I looked in the windows of the supplement store. It used to be a candy store but there weren’t enough kids around.

At Juice Vibes, we ran into a neighbor. E went off to the farmer’s market with him so I walked home alone. It was sunny. The smoothie went straight to my brain. I used to drink smoothies every day between college classes. A place in the student center. I don’t know what’s there now, but they don’t serve smoothies.

There was this forest, a small one, behind Duke Chapel. It had two paths, both going to the science center. I took a few classes at the science center and would walk along the trails sipping all that fruit juice crushed and iced up. It was best in the winter when you were already cold because it gave you a good excuse – ‘this is fashionable, it’s hip, it’s in.’ You wanted your innards to match the outside. I got banana mango back then but today I went with pineapple.

These have been my days: tired out, up early, waiting for the season to change. Now it’s changing and I guess I’ve got to start working. New Years, flashing cameras, one more walk off the broad, dark pier. It’ll be better in 2020. Or maybe it won’t. But I have to believe it or I’ll be stuck drowning; squid ink.

Currently Reading: Another Country, James Baldwin

Support Relief for Family Suffering at the Border  – RAICES DONATION CAMPAIGN

Ink, a Drug.

Vladimir Nabokov, Bend Sinister

Coffee Log, Year 2, Day 208


Coffee: Lady Grey Tea

I woke up early and walked outside. It smelled like autumn but looked like summer – all the trees soaked in sangria sunlight, kids outside, cracked egg. I wanted to walk. My body needed moving. So I walked for thirty minutes to the strip mall nearby.

When I got there, the parking lot was already crowded. Lines out the door of the grocery story. Saturday or not, people had their lives to lead, and they were leading them through the weekend motions. The store had their pumpkins out in three-tiered towers. There were red ones and white ones, but mostly orange.

I didn’t stop at the grocery. I walked past the Staples. There’s a local store selling beets and wheatgrass ground up into drinks and powders, I bought a fruit smoothie from them and it tasted like a pina colada. It was good.

Walking home, I talking on the phone with a friend. It felt bright to be alive without any walls around me, and nice to share that feeling with someone else.

Currently Reading: Queen, Suzanne Crain Miller

Support Relief for Family Suffering at the Border  – RAICES DONATION CAMPAIGN

He stopped at a Dunkin’ Donuts and bought me an OJ and a bagel. Bribery wasn’t going to make me forgive him, but I couldn’t say no to carbs and juice.

Shaun David Hutchinson, The Apocalypse of Elena Mendoza